"Kid, grab a cooler?" Marv asked me, pointing a finger from behind a fistful of Coors Light.

Marv goes Striped Bass fishing on Cape Cod beaches with 3 coolers, so I chose the beer cooler, which was heavier but yet the one least likely to stink of cut bait.

I had come to observe Marv to gain a better understanding surfcasting on Cape Cod. Here is the Cape Cod Striper fishing advice Marv bestowed upon me that fateful afternoon:

1. Staying hydrated in the hot Cape Cod sun is essential to catch Striped Bass. To ensure proper hydration, Marv consumes a nonstop supply of Rocky Mountain crisp water with additional fish catching ingredients. Like sunblock, cans of hydration should be vigorously applied prior to beach exposure.
2. Cut bait works best to catch Striped Bass on the Cape. Marv often cures his cut mackerel bait to enhance its scent by refreezing any unused bait after a warm day in the beach sun. After several cycles is can become quite musky.
3. Never tell people that you have caught any fish if they ask. Or they might steal your fishing spot next time. If anyone asks if you have caught anything, say "No, you?"
4. If you do catch a fish, reel it in quickly. If its a keeper Striped Bass, hide it before anyone else notices. Otherwise 20 people will run up and cast out right next to you.
5. If you see bait fish jumping near shore on the beach, make sure to cast out with a steel leader or the bluefish will bite through your line. If you do catch a bluefish and want to eat it, club it in the head with a sand spike and then stab the artery near the heart to bleed it and lessen the gamey taste. Not pretty, but effective. Filet as soon as possible. Soaking bluefish filets in milk prior to cooking also helps limit the strong bluefish taste.
6. If you aren't good at surfcasting from shore, avoid fishing the ORV section Race Point Beach on Cape Cod unless you have a Sea Kayak to tow your line out. Otherwise you'll cast over your neighbor's lines and generally piss eveyone around you off.
7. Baby piping plover eyes are the most efficient bait available for surfcasting on Cape Cod. Even if you don't catch a Striper, you're likely to become a folk hero among beach-loving Cape Cod fishermen. Making environmentalists cry is an added bonus, generally offset by the generous Federal fines for destroying an endangered species.