Note: Due to recent changes in finance laws, we no longer accept payment in the form of sexual favors.

I, ________________________, Hereby authorize LCD Dating services to act as an agent in my search for eternal happiness with the soulmate of my dreams.

Payment for enrollment is $199.00 for the first 3 months, with additional tri-monthly billing applied indefinitely until a written notarized notice requesting cancellation is received at our mailing address.

Lowest Common Denominator Dating Services cannot be held liable for any harm or damages resulting from participation in our dating selection process. We make no promise as to the authenticity of the statements made in our user profiles and personal ads. No background check is performed on our applicants, and we bear no responsibility for the outcome of your interactions with the potential mates you select.

LCD Dating Services is required by recent tort statutes in California to reveal to all potential participants that married men may be subject to blackmail by unscrupulous confidence schemes that often frequent online dating services. We are prohibited from commenting publicly on this matter. Please beware.

We are no longer able to accept cash payments after an unfortunate murder trial last February. Payments via personal checking accounts must be accompanied by a photocopy of a valid driver's license, birth certificate, or US Passport. All licensed sexual offenders must indicate this clearly on the personal check being used to issue payment.

LCD Dating Services' web site is intended for users over the age of 18. Users under 18 must not post nude or inappropriate photographs of themselves. Users over the age of 18 can do whatever they want, just cool it on the auto-erotic asphyxiation. Enough is enough.

Prostitution is illegal, and this web site should not be used to promote any unlawful sexual activity. We shall only accept our 10% finders fee for massage advertisement appointments upon verbal confirmation by the provider that all services rendered were not in violation of the law. We strongly enourage all site visitors to avoid anonymous sexual encounters with attractive strangers, particularly for cash considerations.